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Georgia Rule (R)





Release Date: May 11th, 2007 by Universal Pictures.
The Cast: Jane Fonda, Lindsay Lohan, Felicity Huffman, Dermot Mulroney, Cary Elwes, Garret Hedlund, Hector Elizondo, Zachary Gordon, Laurie Metcalf.
Directed by Gary Marshall.

BASIC PREMISE: Lily (Huffman) sends her out-of-control daughter, Rachel (Lohan), from Los Angeles to live with her own strict mother, Georgia (Fonda) out in Idaho.

ENTERTAINMENT VALUE: Georgia Rule fails both as a drama and as a comedy. Lindsay Lohan plays Rachel, a wild, rebellious girl whose alcoholic mother, Lily, sends her to live with Georgia, Rachel’s grandma, in order to discipline her. What follows is one unrealistic, uncomfortable, convoluted scene after another. Rachel flirts with men way out of her league including Simon (Mulroney), a veterinarian who once dated her mother, and Harlan (Hedlunk), a handsome Mormon who has a girlfriend and must remain chaste until marriage. Soon enough, she tempts him to get sexual on a small boat in the middle of a lake. In a very contrived subplot, she claims to have been sexually molested by her stepfather (played by Cary Elwes, who once played a sweet heartthrob in The Princess Bride, so naturally, he must play a molester now). Every unlikable character seems to be crazy in his/her own way—Lily is an alcoholic and Georgia often gets angry and shoves soap in people’s mouth when she doesn’t like them. It’s hard to imagine how director Gary Marshall or anyone who hasn’t lost their mind, for that matter, could mix comedy with a sexual molestation subplot and think it could actually work as entertainment or as anything other than creepiness. Screenwriter Mark Andrus doesn’t even include a single believable scene or character, which makes for an excruciatingly bland experience and Lindsay Lohan’s most disappointing movie to date.

SPIRITUAL VALUE: Unfortunately, none.

INSULT TO YOUR INTELLIGENCE: Contrived, creepy and convoluted.

NUMBER OF TIMES I CHECKED MY WATCH: 26

IN A NUTSHELL: Thoroughly contrived, creepy and convoluted. Gary Marshall has officially lost his mind.

RECOMMENDED WAY TO WATCH: Never


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